The Wizard of Zo
by Mykonos
Summary: **Finished!** What happens when Wizard of Oz and Pokemon collide, and you add a dash of my insane sense of humor? Read on to find out!
1. Prolouge: Kansas

The Wizard of Zo  
  
Rating: Ah, PG  
  
Category: Well, parody of course  
  
Written: February - September 2002  
  
Summary: What happens when you take Wizard of Oz and mix it with Pokémon, and add a dash of my twisted humor? Read on to find out!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the whole Wizard of Oz or Pokémon thing. Oh, and some parts are made up   
courtesy of Detective Superman.  
  
Author's Note: Now, I know this isn't exactly like the movie or the book. It's like the play! Yes, I'm in the school musical of Oz and this is insanely almost like the play! In fact the first couple lines of dialogue and some other lines are exact word for word!  
  
Feedback: Think of yourself as the generous, wonderful Oz and I as Dorothy asking you to send me feedback. Megamoooooo@aol.com   
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
The Wizard of Zo  
by: Mykonos  
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::camera zooms in on a farm. there is a house surrounded by wheat fields::  
  
"Dorothy? Dorothy sweetie? Where are you?" A young, usually cheerful mother leaned out of a weatherworn, petite house. Her face had traces of worry. "Dorothy?" She came outside and looked around the fields for 'Dorothy.'  
  
"Looking for Dorothy, ma'am?" An elderly professor in the classic white lab coat appeared from absolutely no where.  
  
"Where's she at?"   
  
"I don't know, I was just wondering if you're looking for here."  
  
"Oh you, Oak." The mother laughed, then called out again "Dorothy!"   
  
"Yes mother?" A fake sounding high-pitched voice answered. A young 'girl' with short black hair walked in the wheat fields. ::camera zooms in on Dorothy revealing that it's really Ash in a checkered dress::  
  
"Where've you been?"  
  
"I came right home."  
  
"'Which way did you come? Way of Saffron?"   
  
"I came right home from training, honest I did!"  
  
"All right, now I want you to stay close by. No running off again. Understand?"  
  
"Yes, mom." Dorothy rolled her eyes as her mom went back indoors. 'She' bent over a puddle of water and -behold!- saw a rainbow in it. With a sigh she said "Oh, I just *love* rainbows. Don't you Toto?" She rubbed the electric mouse's head. "I wonder what could possibly be on the other side of one . . ."   
  
Dorothy finished singing her song and had a dreamy, far away looks upon her face. And because this is *Ash* we're talking about, her reverie was quickly shaken away when she saw something shiny.   
  
This 'something shiny' turned out to be the glint in a pidgey's eye. "Oh! A pidgey! I'm going to capture it!" She exclaimed in that mock high toned voice. So being that Pikachu is really a dog, and won't fight, Dorothy threw a rock at the pidgey's head. Which was not very smart because this pidgey was not alone. Suddenly a swarm (yes, a *swarm*) of pidgeys flew around, causing a 'tornado.'  
  
Dorothy's mother happened to be walking by the window at the time and saw this 'tornado.' She frantically gathered up a few precious possessions and ran outside. "Dorothy! Dorothy! Professor Oak!"  
  
::poof!:: There was Oak! "It's a tornado! Quick, everyone inside the storm shelter!" Dorothy was running to the storm shelter and then stopped in her tracks.  
  
"Wait! I forgot something inside!" She turned and ran. Evidently Toto was gone.   
  
"But Dorothy! - "  
  
"It's too late now, Ms. Ketchum." Oak said as he closed the storm shelter doors.   
  
The tornado moved over to the little house and picked it up, and *threw* it violently far, far away. 


	2. Chapter One: Munchkin Land

Chapter 1~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"There! There's the magic house!"   
  
"It flies you say?"  
  
"As sure as I'm a munchkin! It came right out of the sky! Right over the rainbow. Zoooom!"  
  
"Are you sure it killed the wicked wizard?"  
  
"I saw it! It cracked straight on his head! Zoooom!" The zoom obsessed Chansey exclaimed. The mayor of the town went to knock on the door when a hideous screech of an Aerodactyl clock came from inside. The munchkins (or Chanseys, whatever) ran and hide in fear (the wimps).  
  
"Mom? Mommy? Oh, mom I had the strangest dream, I dreamt a tornado caused by my genius threw the house over the rainbow and.. . Hey! Where the heck am I?!" Dorothy looked around frantically. "Gee, this isn't Pallet."  
  
::pink smoke engulfs stage::  
  
When everyone was done gagging on fumes. There stood Nurse Joy, one of them at least. ::Brock! Get off stage!:: in a puffy, pink, sparkly dress with a silver crown atop her red pigtails. "Gosh, now I know this isn't Pallet."  
  
"Hello!" This mysterious sorceress said and smiled. Dorothy backed away and looked around.  
  
"Are you speaking to me, miss?"  
  
"Well, a' course." The sorceress rolled her eyes and the smile disappeared. "So, are you a good witch, or a bad witch?"  
  
"But, I'm not a witch. I'm just the world's greatest Pokémon trainer!" Dorothy exclaimed as beams of light shot out from behind *her* and laughed insanely. "So, how did I get here?"  
  
"Why, your house was thrown over the rainbow."   
  
"Ah. And where is here?"   
  
"This is the county of the munchkins, in the town of Viridian, in the land of Zo."  
  
Dorothy nodded and smiled as if he. . she understood, which she didn't by the way.  
  
"Hey, are you a munchkin?"  
  
"Do I look like I puffy Chansey to you?!" She placed her hands on her hips in an offended manner. "I'm Glenda, the good witch of the north. You have done the munchkins a great deed by killing there Wicked. . . Wizard. . ."   
  
"I killed a wizard?!"  
  
"Or your house did, look." She pointed toward the house with her shiny wand.   
  
"Oh my, that's not going to look so could on my Pokémon license record." Dorothy scratched the base of her neck and sweat dropped.  
  
"Oh, I wouldn't worry about it. He was very wicked."  
  
"Well, in that case, since nobody minds . . ."  
  
"Ask the munchkins what they think."  
  
"And where are these 'munchkins?'" Dorothy made quotation marks in the air as 'she' said munchkins.  
  
"Oh, they're around." Glenda put her hands to her glossed mouth and yelled. "Come out munchkins!" And then she broke into her famous song 'Come out.' And, the munchkins did really come out.   
  
The munchkins stared at Dorothy in amazement. When Glenda finished her song, they all clapped then swarmed around Dorothy. "Thanks for killing him!" They would exclaim, and shake her hand. They whispered to each other. "You know, the wizard really wasn't *that* evil."  
  
After Dorothy had accepted the bountiful amount of gifts, she smiled sadly and said "Thank you very much, but I really do need to get back to Pallet. Could you show me the way?"  
  
"I don't know of this Pallet that you speak of, but I'm sure the Wizard of Zo could get you there."  
  
"That's where I'll go then. To the Wizard of Zo!"  
  
"Well, I'm sorry but I have to go to a manicure, so the munchkins can show you the road to Indigo Plateau. And please take these, they don't match my hair too well." Glenda produced a pair of ruby slippers and gave them to Dorothy. Dorothy put them on. "Oh, they look great on you!" Well, I must go now. Good bye!" ::pinks smoke appears again briefly, then goes away::  
  
::Jesse enters wearing a big black cape:: "Help *Dorothy* get to Indigo Plateau. Will you?" She glared at the munchkins. "That brat killed my pet." She motioned swiftly towards the house and two little furry paws were sticking out from underneath.  
  
"It's the wicked witch of the west! Run for your lives!" The mayor munchkin yelled. They all shrieked annoyingly high and ran.  
  
"Who are you?" Dorothy started to back away, also scared.  
  
"I'm the wicked witch of the west, my dear. It's my pet your house fell on."  
  
"But, I didn't mean to, honest!"  
  
"We'll just see about that. I'll get you my pretty and your little Pikachu too. Just see what kind of a trip you have to Indigo Plateau." She cackled evilly before disappearing as swiftly as she came.  
  
"Oh my . . ." Dorothy muttered as she stood there, all alone, and without a clue on how she was going to get home again. 


	3. Chapter Two: Scarecrow

Author's Note: Hi hi! Sorry it took so long to get this chapter up, but I couldn't remember some of the dialouge, so I had to wing it. Oh yes, and before I forget, I changed it so that James isn't the Wicked Wizard of the East. So, best read just a little bit of the previous chapter. Ok? I found a better character for him. Is it the Tin Man? Maybe. The Lion? Possibly. Whomever it is, you'll just hafta wait and see!  
  
Chapter 2~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Gee, Mr. Mayor, you didn't show me how to get to Indigo Plateau. Hello? Anybody?" Out of the corner of *her* eye, she saw something shiny. She turned around there was a 'scarecrow' hanging on a pole, nothing else but farmland. Dorothy sighed and went back to talking to *herself.* "I wonder which way the munchkins went." The scarecrow pointed in both directions in which the road led. "Well, which? Right or left?" The scarecrow switched the arms around, but they were still pointing in two directions. "Hey! You moved!" Dorothy exclaimed (can you say delayed reaction?) The scarecrow dropped both arms and nodded. "Can you talk?"  
  
"I dunno. I never tried."  
  
"Well, you're talking now."  
  
"Why so I am! Easy, ain't it?"  
  
"Easiest thing in the world, my mom says." Dorothy's eyes welled up with tears. "Oh, I miss my mommy so much. . ."  
  
"Oh, if talking was hard, I'd never be able to do it."  
  
"Well, why not?"  
  
"I haven't got a brain!"  
  
"How do you know?"  
  
"It says so in the script! Wait, I mean. . The farmer that stuffed me left it out."  
  
"I wouldn't worry. Plenty of people get along fine without brains."  
  
"Have you got a brain?"  
  
"Why, of course!" ::audience bursts into laughter:: "Shut up!"  
  
"Well, don't you think it's foolish for me to be stuck up on this pole for the rest of my life?"  
  
"I think I can reach. . ." She stood on her tip-toes and pulled out the nail that was pinning the scarecrow onto the pole. Misty . . I mean the scarecrow stumbled down onto the ground.  
  
"Thank you! Now that I can walk, where shall we go?" The scarecrow asked while walking around to stretch it's legs.  
  
"I've got to find the munchkins."  
  
"They went off. . . there." Yet again, it crossed its arms and pointed in both directions.  
  
"How could they have gone both ways?"  
  
"They were afraid of the witch and ran in all directions, I guess."  
  
"Well, which way is the village."  
  
"If I had any brains, I'd say it was off there." The scarecrow pointed eastward.  
  
"Why there?"  
  
"Most of them ran that way."  
  
"That's were I'll go then." Dorothy started walking rather fast eastward. The scarecrow ran up to *her.*  
  
"After you find the munchkins, you're going to see the great Zo, right?"  
  
Dorothy nodded definitely. "I'm going to ask him to send me back to Pallet."  
  
"Do you think the great Zo could give me brains?"  
  
"I don't see why not."  
  
The scarecrow sighed a happy sigh. "Could I go with you Dorothy?"  
  
"Of course. If you're willing to go all that way just to get a brain."  
  
"A brain. Ah if I only had a brain. . ." 


	4. Chapter Three: Tin Man

Chapter 4~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Well of course the scarecrow had just finished his. . her. . it's song, and by then Dorothy felt pity for the thing. So, she invited her to come along.   
  
They were walking down the dirt path, which lend into the woods, a few miles or so after a farmhouse. "How much longer did the farmer back there say it was Dorothy?"  
  
"Two hoots and a holler down the road, I think."  
  
::director- too hoots and what? jeeze this is screwed up::  
  
"Not much further I guess." Scarecrow the slipped and fell. Dorothy did a quick-glance around, there were no wet patches around, or anything to trip on. The scarecrow must be just plain clumsy. "Whoops, there I go again."  
  
"You ought to be more careful and watch where you're going."  
  
"I would, but I have *no brains!*"  
  
"Oh no, here we go again!" Dorothy threw her hands up in the air, knocking her hideous blonde wig askew. The scarecrow was about to go on ranting, but there was a murmur coming from not too far away.   
  
"Do you hear something?"  
  
"It sounds like it's coming from over there!" Dorothy pulled away some brush, and there was a tin man! Not just any tin man, an artistic one!   
  
The Tin Man murmured again, but would not move. "What's he saying?" Dorothy innocently asked.  
  
"oi. . l" was the murmur again. ::director- tracey stop it! we get it!::  
  
"It sounds. . like oil." Scarecrow looked around and saw a tin can. "Oil can that's it!" She snatched it up. "Where would you like to be oiled first?"  
  
"Oil. . .my jaws. . please." Scarecrow proceeded to oil his jaws. "Oh, thank you! Now if you could. ." They continued and oiled his arms and legs, so he was free to move about. Tin Man couldn't stop thanking them enough. "I just can't thank you enough!"  
  
"It's ok. But, how did you get like that?" Dorothy interrogated.  
  
"Well, see I was out chopping wood and it started to rain. Before I could reach the oilcan or get to a shelter, I was all rusted up."  
  
"Well, you're all better now."  
  
"Yes, well, there's only one thing I need now to be the happiest Tin Man alive. A heart." The lights dimmed and a spot light shone on Tracey, making his tin shimmer.  
  
Dorothy and Scarecrow watched, amused, by the song and dance. When he finished, Scarecrow got an idea. "Tin Man, Dorothy and I are going to see the Great Zo. I'm asking for a brain-"  
  
"-And I'm going to ask to go home to Kansas."  
  
"Do you think the Great Zo could give me a heart?"  
  
"We were going to ask you to come along and see if he would."  
  
"Ok. Let's go. To the Great Zo!" The Tin Man grinned.  
  
"How do we get there?" The Scarecrow was struck with a sense that they all were lost.  
  
"The munchkins will tell us. Here come some now." The little, fat, pink munchkins were giggling and walking along. "Friends, how do we get to Emerald City?"  
  
The mayor replied. "Follow the yellow brick road through the woods, and you should arrive in no time."  
  
"That is" a farmer teased "if the bears don't get you first."  
  
"Bears? What?" Dorothy shook her head. Ash apparently still isn't aware that some animals *do* exist.  
  
"Are there bears in the forest?" Misty knows though. Good girl.  
  
"Fellas, he. .she! wants to know if there are bears in the forest!" The mayor laughed.   
  
"Are there bears?!" A munchkin laughed. The rest of them erupted in giggles.   
  
"There ain't no more bears in the forest. . anymore."  
  
"That's good." Tin Man breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"Nope, the lions and tigers ate them all up." Tin Man and Scarecrow froze in fear as the munchkins continued walking down a random dirt path. The group huddled up and walked ever so slowly chanting  
  
"Lions, and tigers, and bears. Oh my!" Each time they grew louder. "Lions and tigers and bears. Oh my! Lions and tigers and bears. Oh my! Lions and tigers and-"  
  
Suddenly there was a growl, and something ran quickly at them  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Author's Note- ::sarcastiacally:: Wow, whadda cliff hanger. Anywho, sorry that took so long! I forgot *alot* of the lines, so I made most of them up! XD Oh yes, lookie Peirin! Tracey was in it! ::trumpets blare:: Thought you'd like that. Now, I'm off to my other fics, expect chapter 5 soon!   
  
-Myko 


	5. Chapter Four: Lion

Chapter 5~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Rooooaaaar!" A lion charged at the trio. Then, it ran right past them into a tree. (::some lion, but that's what you get when you use Brock::) It shook it's self of any pain and ran to them. It put it's paws up in defense. "Grrr. Put 'em up. Put 'em up. Are you men or are you mice? Put 'em up. Oh. . . " The lion walked over to the scarecrow and shoved her over. "A scaredy cat, eh?"  
  
Dorothy gasped in shock. She walked up to him, and smartly slapped him. Er, just slapped him. "Stop that! It's not nice to pick on things smaller than you!"  
  
"Ow. . ." The lion started sobbing. "Why'd you do that?"  
  
"Why, you're nothing but a big coward!" Dorothy said in surprise.  
  
"Can I help it? Wouldn't you be scared living in a forest with bears all around?"   
  
"But, can't you scare them away?"  
  
"I usually roar at them and they run away. But suppose one day, it doesn't run away?" The lion explained through tears. "See these circles under my eyes? I haven't slept in days. On top of that, I'm hungry all the time."  
  
"But, here in the forest? Wouldn't there be plenty of game to kill?" The scarecrow interrogated.  
  
"There is. But I can't stand the sight of-" his voice squeaked "-blood!" He kicked at the ground, causing some dirt to fly up. "Oh, I wish I was dead." His body stiffened "Only I'm afraid to die too! Oh. ."   
  
"What you need is some courage!" Dorothy stated. (::sarcastically:: really?)   
  
"You're telling me!" The lion sang his infamous 'If I Only Had the Nerve' song.  
  
"Why don't you come with us and ask the great Zo for some?" The Tin Man graciously offered.  
  
"But, what if he says no?"  
  
"Maybe he won't. There's only one way to find out."  
  
"All right. So, which way to Indigo Plateau?"  
  
"Here come some munchkins now. Let's ask them." As the munchkins walked by, they asked. The Munchkins pointed due east. Dorothy glanced at the ground heading in that direction, and saw a golden brick road. "Follow the golden brick road." She observed.  
  
"Follow the golden brick road." Each of her partners echoed. They linked arms and skipped down the pathway to the lovely Indigo Plateau, home of the Great Zo.  
  
::End Act One::  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Well, there ya go! The end of act one! Hope you've enjoyed the show so far. Sorry this chapter was so short, but I promise the last chapters will be longer. Can you belive it, we're almost done! ::wipes away tear:: Yeah, so in the play the lion was absolutely adorable! He was the best actor, but I didn't quite bring that into here, it was hard. Sorry! Until next chapter - see ya!   
  
~Myko 


	6. Chapter Five: The Great, and Terrible Zo

Chapter 6~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
::camera zooms up rapidly on a dark castle on a classic jagged cliff::  
  
"I'll get you. . .Dorothy, and of course you're little dog too!" The wicked witch cackled evilly. Her luminous crystal ball showing the twerps standing nervously in front of the giant doors of Indigo Plateau waiting for a word from the wizard.  
  
A lovely lady by the name of Loreli, dressed in pure indigo walked up and started talking to them. "The wizard is ready to see you now." She curtseyed and opened the doors, revealing a long, ominous hallway. "He's at the end of the hallway. Good luck."  
  
The group started walking down the hallway reluctantly. It seemed like forever until they reached the next set of doors. They looked back one last time as if to say goodbye to the shaded, purple stained glass, and matching ceramic tiles. They entered and saw a head floating amidst amethyst flames. "What do *you* want?!" The voice boomed, making everything surrounding shake.   
  
Dorothy walked up first. She dipped and said "my name's Dorothy, mister Zo, and I was wondering if you could send me back to Pallet."  
  
"Ha! Don't try to fool me. You're not Dorothy! You're a silly boy in an atrocious wig!" Brock stood up.  
  
"Atrocious? Only one male would say that word. You're not really a wizard - you're James from Team Rocket!" He then glanced over at a glaring Jesse. "Oh yes, we're in a play. . ."  
  
Everyone regained what little composure they had and continued the correct way (much to the director's relief) "and what about this oversized mattress behind you?" Zo shouted.  
  
"Don't push it." the scarecrow muttered under her breath. "I'm just a scarecrow, wanting a brain."  
  
"And this shaking pile of scrap metal?!"  
  
"I'm just an ordinary tin man, your highness, wanting a heart."  
  
"And this overgrown mouser?"  
  
Shaking violently, and stammering uncontrollably, the lion managed to produce a sound. "C-c-c-"  
  
"SPEAK!"  
  
"Courage!" He then resumed his position on the floor.   
  
"And why would I do these things for you?"  
  
"Because your great and terrible, and we are small and meek." Dorothy squeaked.   
  
A pause of silence followed, while the wizard thought this all over. "All right, I'll do these things for you. On one condition. Bring me the wicked witch's broomstick!"   
  
"Wouldn't you just want the wicked witch?" Misty teased. "You *do* have a thing for her."  
  
"No! Her broomstick!" Zo shakily replied, his eyes darting back and forth. "Now, go! And don't return until you have it!"   
  
The group ran out, and set off to the home of the wicked witch. 


	7. Chapter 6: Castle of the Wicked Witch

Chapter 6~~~~~~  
  
The Wicked Witch let out an ear-splitting laugh at the image in the crystal ball. "Come to kill me and take my broomstick, ay? We'll just see about *that!*" She snapped around, her cape and hair flying wildly. "Jenny!"   
  
Her right-hand personnel ran up and saluted. "Jenny, get Dorothy and bring her back. And give the rest our usual welcoming."   
  
The former officer nodded and ran off wordlessly. Yes, a good character gone bad. Within seconds, Dorothy was standing in the room with the Wicked Witch.   
  
"W-where am I?" Were the first nervous words from Dorothy's mouth.  
  
"Why, you're in my castle."  
  
"W-where's everyone?"   
  
"Oh, they'll be treated with the usual welcoming." Jesse's lips curled into a mischievous smile.   
  
Just then, something completely and utterly unexpected happened! The scarecrow burst down the door. And randomly started doing a little dance. Jesse stared at the little girl, fist crushing the handle of a baseball bat, and a growl escaping her throat.  
  
Then, the tin man came through the broken doorway yelling at the top of his lungs. "FE FI FO FUM! I SMELL THE BLOOD OF AN ENGLISHMAN!"  
  
The director vainly tried to straighten things out. "Stop! Please stop! Joy! What are you doing here?"  
  
The random Good Witch curtseyed. "Why, I'm the good witch!" She smiled.   
  
With all this chaos happening, it was the perfect chance for escaped for Dorothy and her dog. But she didn't take it. She decided to add to the chaos and break out into song.  
  
"We're off to see the wizard. The wonderful wizard of. ." Ash's face twisted in confusion. "Zo? How original!" She sarcastically exclaimed. "Couldn't they have come up with a remotely okay name? I mean-" she continued her rant.  
  
Jesse, being the lovely person that she is, couldn't take the twerps anymore. So . . . she simply killed them. How? Ask the director.   
  
::the lights dim::  
  
From the darkness, the Wicked Witch's voice meekly called out. "Hello? Hello? Aw, foo. I'm gonna get kicked out of my apartment if I don't pay the rent soon . . ."   
  
END  
  
~~~~~~  
Author's Note: Aiya, it's done. I must say I had *way* too much fun writing this. Flame me if you must for mocking the charcters. And thanks one last time to Detective Superman for coming with with the ending. Bye! 


End file.
